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Old 11-19-2007, 08:43 PM    (permalink
jballa838
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Default If you had a time machine...

What are 3 things you would do?

Rules: You can achieve no monetary gain directly from this.
Here's mine:
1. Murder William Shakespeare.
2. Hang out with Walter Payton
3. Catch Barry Bonds taking steroids.
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Originally Posted by slightlyabroncosfan View Post
JBalla is mormon, so naturally he assumes that whenever you get one marriage done, another two or five are in the works.

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Old 11-19-2007, 08:45 PM    (permalink
fischbowl
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1. Party with Sidney Ponson
2. Stop V.I. Lenin from taking over my homeland.
3. Help The Dude Save The Day
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:52 PM    (permalink
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1. Personal Reason...
2. meet Jesus
3. go back and see how the Neanderthals lived or something
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:55 PM    (permalink
AlexDown
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1. Have my parents teach me a second or third language when I was young.
2. Learn to play golf at an earlier age.
3. Start working out habits a lot earlier.
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:55 PM    (permalink
Chucky
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1. Find out what the **** happened with JFK
2.See the Dinosaurs
3. Kill Hitler
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:56 PM    (permalink
cardsalltheway
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jballa838 View Post
1. Murder William Shakespeare.
Quite the intellectual we have on our hands here.

1. Meet Jesus
2. Give Drew Brees' father a condom
3. Catch the '81 NC
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:57 PM    (permalink
D-Unit
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Originally Posted by cardsalltheway View Post
Quite the intellectual we have on our hands here.

1. Meet Jesus
2. Give Drew Brees' father a condom
3. Catch the '81 NC
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:59 PM    (permalink
jballa838
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Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by cardsalltheway View Post
Quite the intellectual we have on our hands here.

1. Meet Jesus
2. Give Drew Brees' father a condom
3. Catch the '81 NC
those are good ones, but i hate shakespeare.
i forgot to mention i would take a dictionary to some guy and let him "invent the words"
i have to memorize a shakespeare sonnet by tomorrow and none have real words.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by slightlyabroncosfan View Post
JBalla is mormon, so naturally he assumes that whenever you get one marriage done, another two or five are in the works.

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Old 11-19-2007, 09:05 PM    (permalink
cardsalltheway
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Originally Posted by jballa838 View Post
those are good ones, but i hate shakespeare.
i forgot to mention i would take a dictionary to some guy and let him "invent the words"
i have to memorize a shakespeare sonnet by tomorrow and none have real words.
Eh, a lot of people do and I wasn't a big fan before, but once you get used to how its written, its great stuff.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:08 PM    (permalink
jballa838
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Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by cardsalltheway View Post
Eh, a lot of people do and I wasn't a big fan before, but once you get used to how its written, its great stuff.
Well i dont really want to memorize a sonnet anyway, it is incredibly hard
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Quote:
Originally Posted by slightlyabroncosfan View Post
JBalla is mormon, so naturally he assumes that whenever you get one marriage done, another two or five are in the works.

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Old 11-21-2007, 06:07 PM    (permalink
steelersfan43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cardsalltheway View Post
Quite the intellectual we have on our hands here.

1. Meet Jesus
2. Give Drew Brees' father a condom
3. Catch the '81 NC

Why are you hatin on drew? And besides drew brees> jesus anywho. atleasts hes for true.
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:57 PM    (permalink
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1. Hang out with Jim Belushi or Chris Farley (Try to stop that downward spiral)
2. Stop Huey P. Long from being assassinated. (Best governor LA has ever had and possibly would have been an even better president. Thank you for Tiger Stadium Huey!)
3. Kill Tom Benson and takeover the Saints before the many years of terrible decisions.
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:59 PM    (permalink
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saintsfan912 View Post
1. Hang out with Jim Belushi or Chris Farley (Try to stop that downward spiral)
2. Stop Huey P. Long from being assassinated. (Best governor LA has ever had and possibly would have been an even better president. Thank you for Tiger Stadium Huey!)
3. Kill Tom Benson and takeover the Saints before the many years of terrible decisions.
Good choice. Go Tigers.
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Old 11-19-2007, 08:59 PM    (permalink
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1. Convince my parents to let me play hockey, because I think that I'd be really good. My first and only time skating, I was as good as my friend who was playing for 5 years
2. Choose to learn Spanish instead of French (everything is in Spanish now)
3. See the dinosaurs (like Chucky said)
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my lord...I cannot imagine such a world where I can mention Raymell Rice's thighs around a girl and not be the only one sexually aroused
Quote:
But for everyone reading this in Buffalo and Cleveland and everywhere else, take solace in the following: As crazy as it sounds, you're lucky. Your Mount Everest experience is still ahead of you. It's waiting, and it's glorious.- Bill Simmons

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Old 11-20-2007, 04:42 PM    (permalink
TimD
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bills2083 View Post
1. Convince my parents to let me play hockey, because I think that I'd be really good. My first and only time skating, I was as good as my friend who was playing for 5 years
2. Choose to learn Spanish instead of French (everything is in Spanish now)
3. See the dinosaurs (like Chucky said)
You're friend must suck... no offense of course to either of you

1. Convince my parents to let me play goalie when I first started playing hockey.
2. Convince my younger self to have a better work ethic when it comes to school and to get my priorities straight
3. Meet Jesus
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Old 11-20-2007, 05:19 PM    (permalink
KILLERSANTA
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1. Rape Marilyn Monroe
2. kill a dinosaur and eat it.
3. Beat-off in 1932
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Old 11-20-2007, 05:51 PM    (permalink
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1. Rape Marilyn Monroe
2. kill a dinosaur and eat it.
3. Beat-off in 1932
My epic win alarm has gone off.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:00 PM    (permalink
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1 - Learn to play hockey younger
2 - Hang out with Bill Gates
3 - Find Ossama
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:00 PM    (permalink
NYGibril28
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I have a time machine, problem is, it only goes forward at regular speed. It's essentialy just a carboard box but on the side i wrote "Time Machine" in sharpie.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:10 PM    (permalink
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NYGibril28 View Post
I have a time machine, problem is, it only goes forward at regular speed. It's essentialy just a carboard box but on the side i wrote "Time Machine" in sharpie.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:14 PM    (permalink
NYGibril28
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Hey Paul, learn your Demetri Martin.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:19 PM    (permalink
Paul
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NYGibril28 View Post
Hey Paul, learn your Demetri Martin.
I don't care who said it. It's still lame

Edit: original comment was a bit much.

Last edited by Paul : 11-19-2007 at 09:26 PM.
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:30 PM    (permalink
NYGibril28
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paul View Post
I don't care who said it. It's still lame

Edit: original comment was a bit much.
the original nature of the joke made it funnier
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:03 PM    (permalink
YAYareaRB
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1. Be a Patriots fan
2. Become an Actor
3. Become a Rapper
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Old 11-19-2007, 09:07 PM    (permalink
Moses
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I wouldn't do anything. Messing with the past would obviously mess with the future. You make the slightest change and who knows what happens. :D
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