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Old 11-03-2007, 01:59 PM    (permalink
bearsfan_51
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How does it surprise you at all? People want what they can't have. Me ignoring her and turning her down just made her want me more. She was incredibly drunk, so that partially explains the patheticness of it.

The problem with not telling him, she WILL cheat on him. It isn't a matter of if, only a matter of when. I have been cheated on b a significant other. It was because I didn't listen to my friends, so I know all about that part. However, even though my friends pissed me off at the time, after it happened and I realized they were right, I was glad they told me.

But your side is why I am having so much trouble with this. But it also isn't the first time something like this has happened before(first time with me, others have similar stories, usually not to the extent of actually physically pulling them towards a bed though.)
The point is that it's not YOUR job to police HIS relationship. If she really is that pathetic, and your friend is with her, don't you think that says something about him?

Even assuming that you would want someone to tell you, does that mean he would? If it was my best friend I would tell him, but my friend wouldn't date a girl that gets wasted and throws herself on other people like a dumb *****. That's something to take into consideration.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:00 PM    (permalink
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How does it surprise you at all? People want what they can't have. Me ignoring her and turning her down just made her want me more. She was incredibly drunk, so that partially explains the patheticness of it.

The problem with not telling him, she WILL cheat on him. It isn't a matter of if, only a matter of when. I have been cheated on b a significant other. It was because I didn't listen to my friends, so I know all about that part. However, even though my friends pissed me off at the time, after it happened and I realized they were right, I was glad they told me.

But your side is why I am having so much trouble with this. But it also isn't the first time something like this has happened before(first time with me, others have similar stories, usually not to the extent of actually physically pulling them towards a bed though.)
Your humility astounds me..........................
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On another note, Nicklas Backstrom is amazingly good.
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Meanwhile, in hockey the other night, the Washington Capitals' Eric Belanger gets hit with a stick, loses EIGHT teeth, has an instant root canal in the locker room, comes back out and PLAYS and never says boo.

So new rule, NBA: Unless you have a root canal at halftime, SHUT UP AND PLAY!
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:01 PM    (permalink
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Haha...

How old are you? Have you ever been in a situation like this before?

I know that kindgergarden tells to to always tell the truth, but sometimes things are better left unsaid. It's called using your brain.
I am leaning towards his side, because I have been on the opposite side of a situation like this. Sure, I got really pissed at my friends at first, but after what they said came true I realized they were only looking out for me, and they are all probably going to be lifelong friends.

This whole situation ******* sucks.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:01 PM    (permalink
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18. How can you even consider lying to a best friend? You'd rather him find out down the line by walking in on it?
How is it lying? If he ****** her, then he should tell her. But he didn't do anything wrong, he did exactly what a good friend should do. As far as their friendship is concerned he is absolved. Now, if he's a certified relationship therapist then he's qualified to handle the rest, but it's really not his business.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:02 PM    (permalink
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Your humility astounds me..........................
It's true though...

Can't blame him for speaking the truth.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:02 PM    (permalink
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I don't see how he can let his friend continue to date a girl like this knowing what happened.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:02 PM    (permalink
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Your humility astounds me..........................
I was saying that it really didn't have anything to do with me... Only the fact that she couldn't have me, because she is LIVING WITH MY FRIEND! Well, that and the fact that she is nothing but a ***-dumpster.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:03 PM    (permalink
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I don't see how he can let his friend continue to date a girl like this knowing what happened.
It's not his decision to make. Still, I would tell him what happened. What he chooses to do with that information is up to him.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:03 PM    (permalink
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I don't see how he can let his friend continue to date a girl like this knowing what happened.
Do you honestly go around telling your friends who they should and should not date? How is that even remotely your business?
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:04 PM    (permalink
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The point is that it's not YOUR job to police HIS relationship. If she really is that pathetic, and your friend is with her, don't you think that says something about him?

Even assuming that you would want someone to tell you, does that mean he would? If it was my best friend I would tell him, but my friend wouldn't date a girl that gets wasted and throws herself on other people like a dumb *****. That's something to take into consideration.
I wouldn't be policing his relationship, I would just tell him what happened and leave it at that. If he doesn't believe me, then he isn't as good of a friend as I thought, and I probably could have ****** her.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:05 PM    (permalink
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Do you honestly go around telling your friends who they should and should not date? How is that even remotely your business?
I realize I've been sounding a bit like I would tell them to break-up, I obviously wouldn't do that, but I would definitely tell him what happened. It's his call from there.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:06 PM    (permalink
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It's true though...

Can't blame him for speaking the truth.
Ya, why do you think people want superstars so much? Most of them aren't any hotter than girls you meet out.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:07 PM    (permalink
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That's bull. He has to tell him. If he's any kind of friend you tell him straight up right now what happened. So what if it hurts, better now than later on.
ya i agree with Gibril.. you ahve to tell him that happened.. i know if my girlfreind did that i would wanna know for sure.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:09 PM    (permalink
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Ya, why do you think people want superstars so much? Most of them aren't any hotter than girls you meet out.
Superstars are a different story. Mostly the Backstreet Boy effect.

Humans are lazy. If they see a bunch of their peers are interested in somebody, they just assume that person has a lot going for them. Saves them the trouble of meeting the person and validating themselves.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:12 PM    (permalink
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ya i agree with Gibril.. you ahve to tell him that happened.. i know if my girlfreind did that i would wanna know for sure.
Why would you date a girl like that at all?

I dunno....maybe it's an age gap thing. Looking back when I was a drunken teenager/undergrad I dated a lot of stupid girls (though to my knowledge was never cheated on), but the solution to this problem isn't to make friends that will tell you everything, it's to not date attention-seeking drunken whores. There are a lot of attractive, intelligent, mature, women out there that don't need acknowledgement by shoving their tits in people's faces.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:13 PM    (permalink
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Superstars are a different story. Mostly the Backstreet Boy effect.

Humans are lazy. If they see a bunch of their peers are interested in somebody, they just assume that person has a lot going for them. Saves them the trouble of meeting the person and validating themselves.
Those go hand in hand. When a lot of people want someone, it makes it tougher for any specific person to have them.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:16 PM    (permalink
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Why would you date a girl like that at all?

I dunno....maybe it's an age gap thing. Looking back when I was a drunken teenager/undergrad I dated a lot of stupid girls (though to my knowledge was never cheated on), but the solution to this problem isn't to make friends that will tell you everything, it's to not date attention-seeking drunken whores. There are a lot of attractive, intelligent, mature, women out there that don't need acknowledgement by shoving their tits in people's faces.
That is completely true. Although, my friend is kinda naive and very trusting, which is another reason I am having so much trouble deciding. It really sucks to shatter a friends worldview.

I've learned not to date ***-dumpsters, they are only good as a masturbation substitute.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:20 PM    (permalink
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Why would you date a girl like that at all?

I dunno....maybe it's an age gap thing. Looking back when I was a drunken teenager/undergrad I dated a lot of stupid girls (though to my knowledge was never cheated on), but the solution to this problem isn't to make friends that will tell you everything, it's to not date attention-seeking drunken whores. There are a lot of attractive, intelligent, mature, women out there that don't need acknowledgement by shoving their tits in people's faces.
I see the point you're trying to make, but the point is, he is involved. As a friend, you got to look out for your other friends. All he has to do is tell him what happened. If his friend doesn't do anything about it, then oh well.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:38 PM    (permalink
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No I'm with ya 51. I mean if you truly want to tell your friend then be my guest, but you did not thing wrong here. She came on to you, and you pushed her away. Stuff like this happens (I'm in kind of in the same situation, only this girl has not made a move on me).

I understand you feel bad about what happened but is it really worth the drama to tell your friend his girl tried coming on to you when nothing happened? She's going to cheat on him and he'll find out then, but again since nothing happened with you two it's just not worth it.

Just like I probably "should" tell my dad I went to the hospital for drinking, but on the other hand I know that it'll create a situation that could be avoided by not telling him, because he won't find out unless my mom says something.

You my friend from what I've been reading are quite the "ladies man" or so you say, and if this guy is one of your best friends and if he knows you and the fact that you hook up with girls and have "game" then he might be hesitant to believe you, just like I'm a little hesitant to believe you right now...So my advice is to just keep this on lock, and if he finds out and comes to talk to you about it, then yea that's the time you explain what happened and you explain that since you didn't do anything wrong you thought it'd be best to keep it on the down low to avoid a confrontation.

That's my two cents.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:40 PM    (permalink
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And I also understand the "honesty" thing in friendship, but again since nothing happened other than her making a move on you, I don't see what the big deal is to tell your friend. You shouldn't feel guilty about what happened because she made a move on you, not the other way around.
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Despite looking better against an underachieving Eagles team, I still think the Bears are one of the worst teams in the NFL. I smell a blowout victory by the Lions this week and a division sweep.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:46 PM    (permalink
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Ladies man isn't exactly how I would describe myself. Yes, I know a lot about girls, but I haven't really completely internalized it yet. I have enough game that I don't really go through many dry spells(even though I am going through a severe one right now), but I am far from being able to go out and hook up with a girl anytime I go out, in fact, I have never had a one night stand, it is always been after going on a date.

I don't get what is so unbelievable about the story. My friend is dating a *****, she came onto me. I didn't need any game, I just don't treat her as someone I would hook up with. So since she is an attention starved *****, she wonders why I don't hit on her. Since she can't have me, she wants me.
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:49 PM    (permalink
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And I also understand the "honesty" thing in friendship, but again since nothing happened other than her making a move on you, I don't see what the big deal is to tell your friend. You shouldn't feel guilty about what happened because she made a move on you, not the other way around.
I know I shouldn't feel guilty, but guilt has nothing to do with why I would tell him. It would only be that she will cheat on him with someone, if she hasn't already; and a heads up might help him deal with it(if he doesn't end it with her after what happened.)
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:50 PM    (permalink
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And I also understand the "honesty" thing in friendship, but again since nothing happened other than her making a move on you, I don't see what the big deal is to tell your friend. You shouldn't feel guilty about what happened because she made a move on you, not the other way around.
so you're saying that even though "nothing" happened and it wasn't his fault, then he doesn't have to tell his friend? What if this girl has been/is going to cheat on his friend with another guy, and his friend ends up getting hurt from it? When he could have prevented it by letting his friend know what kind of girl she was...if his friend wants to stay with her after that then that's his decision, but IMO you should tell him
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Old 11-03-2007, 02:59 PM    (permalink
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If he wants to go and tell him then that's his business, I'm just stating what I think because I've been here before, or well not personally been here but I know friends of mine who have gone through this.

And one friend told the other that his girl kissed him (just like your situation) and the other friend snapped out. They aren't near as good of friends as they were before. I realize that it should be simple and that your friend while upset should understand that you didn't do anything wrong, but I'm just telling you that it might end up being extremely bad.
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Despite looking better against an underachieving Eagles team, I still think the Bears are one of the worst teams in the NFL. I smell a blowout victory by the Lions this week and a division sweep.
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Old 11-03-2007, 03:03 PM    (permalink
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They aren't near as good of friends as they were before. I realize that it should be simple and that your friend while upset should understand that you didn't do anything wrong, but I'm just telling you that it might end up being extremely bad.
Is the guy and the girl still together? If so, once they break up those guys will probably be back to being friends.
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