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Old 12-17-2010, 12:56 PM    (permalink
MetSox17
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Unless you're clearly just friends, don't ever bring anyone on a lunch/dinner date. Ever.
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Old 12-17-2010, 12:59 PM    (permalink
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If I knew it was a date, I would agree.

But yeah, I was leaning that way anyways.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:01 PM    (permalink
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Well, you don't have to confirm with her to see if it's an "official" date. You asked her out to eat, she said yes. That's usually how it works? Unless i'm missing something.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:04 PM    (permalink
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Yeah, I dunno it's just a weird situation. But you're right.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:09 PM    (permalink
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Originally Posted by bsaza2358 View Post
She isn't changing her mind. She was going to move regardless. Enjoy your time, but be prepared for a crushing feeling when she moves. As long as she's there, you can fall into the denial trap. The responsible thing is to drop her and move on now. However, it's going to be a little easier to get over her because she's in a different city. You can definitely enjoy this situation, but don't be surprised when she leaves and drifts away. Once she's gone, let her go. It will be easier on both of you.
Oh, I expect her to leave. I am okay with that. I can see certain things that, if she wasn't moving, would probably make this relationship not last. Like I said, I am okay with it.

Yes, I will be sad to see her go, but I am in a weird time in my life where a long term relationship is not the best idea. So, knowing it's going to end makes it all easier. Plus she'll be in a part of the country I have no intention of moving to.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:40 PM    (permalink
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Check it out.

So there is this girl. Back about a year ago I had a huge crush on her, it didn't happen. After a while we became social, talking to each other and ish. As of right now she knows I dig her. It hasn't been said, but she definitely knows.

Now, this is different than the first time around. I look and act very different. Me and her are cool and she knows what's up, but we go to different schools. We're back in home for Christmas break and my friend threw a party, she stopped by for like an hour on my suggestion. Not sure what vibe I got at all. Couldn't tell either way.

But anyways, she's going on a cruise tomorrow with her family and I told her a few days ago that we should get Casa (mexican food place) before she leaves. Today I texted her and when I said something about it she was like, I'm always up for some Casa, but I'm eating lunch with my parents and working tonight so it would have to be after work. She gets off at like 8, I was like that's early, I could go around then, want to text me when you get off? And she is going to.

However, not sure how to go about this. Should I go alone? Bring friends? I'm not sure... the context of eating wasn't discussed and I don't want anything to be awkward. Then again, if she comes alone and I bring people I might feel dumb.
Sounds pretty clear to me that you're absolutely and totally overthinking this stuff. You guys are home over break, and you have maybe 1 week with her after her family vacation. She probably has to be up early tomorrow, so the fact that she's looking to spend time with you is nice. Just go to dinner with her alone and stop worrying about it. Read the situation for what it is, be your regular charming self, and go with it. Don't act like a nervous fool. Right now, you seem so worked up over what might be that you're not willing to pay attention to anything. Stay focused on the situation and being with her and what she's saying. Go from there.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:41 PM    (permalink
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Oh, I expect her to leave. I am okay with that. I can see certain things that, if she wasn't moving, would probably make this relationship not last. Like I said, I am okay with it.

Yes, I will be sad to see her go, but I am in a weird time in my life where a long term relationship is not the best idea. So, knowing it's going to end makes it all easier. Plus she'll be in a part of the country I have no intention of moving to.
Keep that perspective and enjoy the time you have together. Glad you're staying realistic about it. Also note that if she wasn't leaving, it might never have gotten that far. I've seen tons of people who are leaving town let loose and give other people chances that they wouldn't have otherwise because they have nothing to lose. Be very aware that once she moves, it's over, and act accordingly.
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Old 12-17-2010, 01:52 PM    (permalink
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If I knew it was a date, I would agree.

But yeah, I was leaning that way anyways.
You are meeting her on a Friday night for dinner, and she hasn't asked you to bring anyone else. Go solo. It could be a date, but she might just be interested in seeing you and catching up. Read the situation as it goes. See what happens. Go in with a simple gameplan based on each scenario. Relax, smile, run your game, and see what happens.

For the record, I lean date, but I also predict he'll be too nervous and worried about what might be to make anything of it. No offense intended. Just feel like you're overthinking and not prone to making the proper calls.
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Old 12-17-2010, 06:14 PM    (permalink
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No offense taken. If I ever overthink things, it's with this girl.
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Old 12-18-2010, 05:20 AM    (permalink
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Got cockblocked tough tonight. There's always gotta be the jealous spiteful friend huh?
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Old 12-18-2010, 11:03 AM    (permalink
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If you have douche-y friends, then there always will be... haha
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Old 12-18-2010, 02:13 PM    (permalink
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yeah dude i love to go to bars and frat parties to get totally hammered and try to hook up with random girls its so awesome
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Old 12-18-2010, 02:47 PM    (permalink
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yeah dude i love to go to bars and frat parties to get totally hammered and try to hook up with random girls its so awesome
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Old 12-18-2010, 02:48 PM    (permalink
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high five for using a meme
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Old 12-18-2010, 05:12 PM    (permalink
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Be very aware that once she moves, it's over, and act accordingly.
That's the plan, I think the nice thing is that I've been in a loooooooooong dry streak and this is ending it haha.
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Old 12-18-2010, 08:54 PM    (permalink
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Scary moment guys. That Asian chick that I hooked up with (has been multiple times now, by the way) was casually texting me, no big deal. Our conversation finished so I thought we were done texting for the night. Two hours later I get a text from her saying, "Hey, what r we?". Yikes. I sent back "? What do you mean?". No response yet, but I don't like where this is going.
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Old 12-18-2010, 09:06 PM    (permalink
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her: 'Hey, what r we?'
you: 'Human, unless you're a bear'
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Old 12-18-2010, 09:09 PM    (permalink
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Scary moment guys. That Asian chick that I hooked up with (has been multiple times now, by the way) was casually texting me, no big deal. Our conversation finished so I thought we were done texting for the night. Two hours later I get a text from her saying, "Hey, what r we?". Yikes. I sent back "? What do you mean?". No response yet, but I don't like where this is going.
Her: "Hey, what r we?"
You: "Packers have injuries"


Sex follows.
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Old 12-18-2010, 10:30 PM    (permalink
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If you have douche-y friends, then there always will be... haha
It wasn't one of my friends it was one of hers obviously lol.
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Old 12-19-2010, 12:55 AM    (permalink
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Scary moment guys. That Asian chick that I hooked up with (has been multiple times now, by the way) was casually texting me, no big deal. Our conversation finished so I thought we were done texting for the night. Two hours later I get a text from her saying, "Hey, what r we?". Yikes. I sent back "? What do you mean?". No response yet, but I don't like where this is going.
Easy. You text her back: "I don't like having these kinds of conversations over the phone, why don't you come over tonight around midnight and we'll talk..."

She comes over around midnight, you bang her out, buy her breakfast, bang her out again, and she feels better. You don't have to have the talk for at least another 2 weeks!
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Old 12-19-2010, 04:48 AM    (permalink
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This is the worst weekend ever I swear im drinking by myself trying to forget all of this tomorrow..
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Old 12-19-2010, 09:23 PM    (permalink
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Well, the girl I said I was seeing is leaving this spring semester to study abroad. Very glad, I need the space. This has its perk though, she is flying me to the country she is studying on spring break (Barcelona, Spain) paying for my ticket, and then we're taking a train to Amsterdam to party hard for a few days, then hitting up Paris.

This sucks though, I think she feels like we're getting serious and I don't take it seriously at all.. I refuse to even call her my gf. But jesus, she spoils the living **** out of me.
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Old 12-20-2010, 10:41 AM    (permalink
MetSox17
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Yeah, make sure she doesn't know that until after she flies you out across the world.
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Old 12-20-2010, 11:28 AM    (permalink
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BuckeyeDan17 View Post
Well, the girl I said I was seeing is leaving this spring semester to study abroad. Very glad, I need the space. This has its perk though, she is flying me to the country she is studying on spring break (Barcelona, Spain) paying for my ticket, and then we're taking a train to Amsterdam to party hard for a few days, then hitting up Paris.

This sucks though, I think she feels like we're getting serious and I don't take it seriously at all.. I refuse to even call her my gf. But jesus, she spoils the living **** out of me.
Seems like you're in a relationship where you're not challenged in any way. Deep down, you know you're with someone who offers you nothing but the financial benefits and status. You are essentially a gold digger, and I get the sense that you really don't like it. You don't sound like you're bragging. More like stating a fact and feeling relief.

This isn't the first time you've been in this situation. I remember this summer there was at least 1 other girl who you went after because of her money, and you ended up getting bored and treating her badly.

I don't really like the idea of anyone getting used. I prefer healthy relationships for everyone. My hope for you is that you find an awesome girl who challenges you and helps you fulfill what you want out of life. When you aim high in terms of the girl you want, you might end up happier.
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Old 12-20-2010, 11:35 AM    (permalink
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This is the same one. I started treating her a lot better, I mean a hell of a lot better, she even pointed it our herself. Here's the thing, she is awesome to be around, I won't lie, very fun, similar tastes in music, we have a **** ton in common. But I'm still having a hard time getting over my ex I was telling you guys about, we haven't spoken in 2 months and I'm pretty proud of myself for it.

I actually like spending time with her, I just don't want a title, or girls to think I'm not single..

But, I don't want you guys to think I'm a piece of ****.. I didn't know she was wealthy as hell until after getting to know her, that's when the spoil party came to town.

Thanks for not accusing me of being a complete bastard bsaza, I'm starting to feel like it now though. Here's another thing, she keeps telling me she doesn't want a serious relationship, same things as me, wants no pressure, etc.. Yet, I am starting to feel pressure to commit to her. Plus, she got me court-side IU-Ohio State basketball tickets for their big ten opener, how in the hell do I just tell her how I feel about this without breaking her heart dude?
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